Sirach
Chapter 9
Dealing With Women
Do not be jealous of your own wife; do not give her any reason to shame you.
Do not place yourself under any woman’s control to the point where she can dominate you.
Avoid approaching women of ill repute to prevent falling into their traps.
Do not linger with a singing girl for fear of being caught in her snare.
Do not fix your gaze on a young girl to avoid becoming involved in her judgment.
Do not surrender yourself to prostitutes, lest you lose your inheritance.
Do not glance around the streets or linger in lonely places.
Turn your eyes away from an attractive woman and do not stare at a beautiful foreigner. A woman’s beauty has led many astray; in her presence, love ignites like fire.
Never sit close to a married woman or drink wine with her, to prevent your feelings from stirring and leading you to downfall.
Long-time Friend
Do not abandon an old friend, for a new one does not hold the same value. New wine, new friends; let them mature, then you will enjoy them with pleasure.
On Relationships With Others
Do not envy the success of the sinner, for you do not know what his end will be.
Do not take pleasure in what pleases the godless; remember that they will be punished before they die.
Keep well away from the man who has the power to kill, and you will not experience the fear of death. But if you go with him, avoid all offense for fear he will take your life; realize that you are passing through deathtraps and walking on top of the wall.
As much as you can, be sociable and seek advice from wise men.
Love to speak with intelligent people, and let all your discussions be about the law of the Most High.
Let righteous men be your companions at dinner; take pride in your reverence for the Lord.
Rulers
An artisan is judged by his work, and a community leader by the wisdom of his words.
A talkative man is feared in his town, and gossip makes him disliked.
Commentaries
Dealing With Women.
Women often do not fare well in the Bible, except in those Gospel passages where Jesus is portrayed as the great innovator of relationships with them. The young man who aspires to be good, and more specifically a wise man, must be much more cautious in his relationships with women than in any other type of relationship. In our current context, we should not focus so much on the “risks” involved in dealing with certain women, but rather educate boys and girls in mutual respect, raise them with a consciousness of equal rights and responsibilities, and, above all, teach them from an early age about the dignity both he and she have before God and men.
Long-time Friend.
A valuable piece of advice: don’t push old friends aside for new ones. Ben Sirach advises that new friends should be tested by time, just as new wine must be left to age to taste better, so too must friendship be given time to see if it is worthy of trust. This advice might seem like a calculating way of understanding relationships; however, it is not entirely wrong. Life experience shows us that not everyone who smiles at us or pats us on the shoulder is truly our friend. The wisdom of our people also warns us, “The eyes can see, but the heart cannot,” or “Better an old acquaintance than a new one.” Ultimately, the main point is to emphasize the importance of prudence and healthy discretion when choosing our friends.
On Relationships With Others.
While it’s valid to be mindful of the people in our social circle, we always have the freedom to choose our friends. Excluding someone because of their way of being, thinking, or acting is not in line with Christian principles. Consider that someone might not fit our social mold due to their behavior, but our challenge is to reach out to them evangelically—not with long speeches, but through our lifestyle. We should never exclude or condemn, but act like Jesus, who welcomed everyone without exception because that is also how the Father is, “he loves us all equally without distinction” (Acts 10:34ff).
Rulers.
The final part of this passage (10:4f) provides the key to understanding it: the governance of the city and the state must be carried out with the patience and skill that a craftsman uses to shape his work; a good craftsman creates beautiful works, and so does a good ruler; his nation serves as a model of a dignified and just society; but, ultimately, this is nothing more than a reflection of what God is, the Great Craftsman who has wisely shaped the world and governs it.